“I was not formed yet, not a decision-maker about my life. I was not yet born to consciousness. But here, suddenly, I was facing the results of being in the world. In those empty, slow, lonely days, I had to be born into my next life, as I lost my old self in a kind of death”
I feel as though this is one of those quotes that are going to stick through the rest of the book. And I guess it would stick in our everyday lives as well, what with us being teenagers and all. This is a great growing up quote. It isn't necessarily a happy one one but when you have "growing up sucks" shoved down your throat your whole life, it kind of doesn't phase you anymore. But I digress. What I'm trying to get at is none of us are formed at this age. (Note: "Us" from here on out will also include "shunned/teenager Meredith" jsyk) None of us have had the chance to 'break the mold' and 'become our own shapes'. Sure, we can choose what shoes to wear or when you want to finally roll out of bed and get ready for school but those aren't significant decisions. We haven't tested the limits of society's standards and fully 'dared to be different'. We've all just been unknowingly going through the motions because that's how its always been. But when we grow up (not just turning 18) and we finally think to ourselves, 'wow this sucks. I guess that's what I get for existing,' then you finally have the chance to rearrange everything. If you realize you don't like your friends or your job or your hobbies, you can get knew ones. You can shuffle and change every aspect of your life until you feel comfortable. And with changing aspects of your life, you also change aspects of yourself. You become a new person and whoever you were before ceases to exist. That's a normal part of life and something that every 'adult' has experienced. That's what it's like to truly exist. It's a result of being in the world and living life.
